Thursday, December 2, 2010

The Power of Attnention, freely given.

I can't even begin to tell you how peaceful these past couple weeks have been. Since the time I wrote about being slower with Carrick, including him with what we do, I have seen amazing results. I have felt minimal stress (even with a house guest over the Thanksgiving week), Carrick has had few, if any, breakdowns, and his communication skills are growing everyday.

Part of my success with communicating with Carrick has been this: Whenever he asks for attention, I give it to him, unquestioned, and immediately (whenever possible.) I have noticed that dropping what I am doing for 1, 5, even 10 minutes, and holding him, or seeing what it is he wants to show me, etc., the return on that investment of time is immeasurable.

I hear parents griping all the time about how their kiddo wants every bit of their attention all the time, and I wonder, what kind of attention they actually give to their little one? Carrick used to do things to get my attention, like pulling hair, or screaming. Both of those behaviors have fallen by the wayside since I have been proactive with giving Carrick attention.

If you're a parent who is stay-at-home, you have a slight advantage because you have all day to spend proactive attention time with your child. For those parents who work, your situation is a little different. Letting your child tell you about their day is just as important as you and your partner discussing your days. Which leads me to my next point: verbal skills.

This method of giving Carrick attention has paved the way for his new breakthrough in verbal skills. His attention lasts longer, so he has the patience to learn new words and how to put them with other words to make two-word sentences. It's one of the developmental tasks for two-year-olds, being able to put two to three words together. Just yesterday alone, he learned 4 or 5 new two-word sentences. One of them was enunciated perfectly, "Hot Pie" he said during a pre-supper snack time.

Giving Carrick attention has worked to his benefit, mine sanity levels have increased, and our family is so much happier for it too. I'm not "giving in", I am simply "giving". Isn't that what the holiday season is all about anyway?

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