"Oh, he's such a cutie pie," a stranger will say to me on any random day I go out with Carrick.
"Oh, thank you! He's a sweetheart," I'll reply with a smile.
"Is he your only one?" is usually the follow up to the opening line.
"Yes. He keeps me quite busy," I politely respond. And then, almost without fail...
"Do you plan on having another?"
*Sigh* I have always been amazed by other peoples' fascination with my family plans. I am not even kidding you when I say that this conversation has happened to me numerous times in various venues with absolute strangers, and sometimes friends or family, but with different words. Why do the strangers care about whether or not there's another baby? Will they ever see me again? Probably not. But at the same time as it annoys me, it is almost flattering in a way. It makes me feel like I am doing something right, that my child is cute and well-developed ( I won't use the word well-mannered, because I don't think it applies to a two-year-old yet) and they want to know if I am going to contribute another terrific child to the world.
Well...to all of you random strangers, as well as to all of my family and friends, I want to tell you here first...we do actually have plans to add to our family in the future...next March to be exact.
That's right, the decision has been made. My husband and I want to welcome our next child to our family in March of 2012. Why March, you may ask? Because of the time it takes to properly imprint, conceive and grow a child, it takes one year. (I'll explain about that in a future entry.) So, since we are a year out from that time, I thought it would be a great opportunity to keep you posted on not only my journey into deeper motherhood, but also to use this next year as a way to focus on the beginnings of parenting on my blog.
Parenting does not begin when your child says "no" for the first time. It doesn't begin when you change the first diaper. It doesn't even begin when the child is born. Parenting actually begins when your child chooses you as their caregiver and you become responsible for that child. Some would say that means at the moment of conception. I would say it happens a little after that, but we won't go into too much detail about that right yet.
The big idea here is that I host a parenting blog and as such I want to start at the beginning. That means I want to talk about what happens on the child's journey into the world as well as the relationship the child has with the parent(s). My hope in all of this is to give a completely honest, open, and factual record of what I will go through as a parent and as an expectant mother. Some of the topics about pregnancy/birth I plan to cover in future entries will include, but are not limited to: diet/nutrition, exercise, stress management, imprinting, choosing a care provider for prenatal check ups/delivery, anatomy and physiology of the expectant mother, fetal development, and labor/delivery to name a few.
I already have a two-year-old toddler in tow, so I will also be including my challenges and triumphs with him along my road to baby #2. So to start out, this month's focus about parenting and mother hood will be the retelling of Carrick's birth story. Some of you may have heard it already, and it may be new to others. Either way, I want to give a clear and honest picture of where I came from as a woman, and how I grew and changed after becoming a mom. What did I learn from his birth? What would I change? What would I keep the same for the next baby?
Also, before closing, I would like to explain the title of this year-long journey...A Perfect Birth. This title may cause some of you to raise your eyebrows and say, "Oh, really?" I confidently answer you back with, "Yes, and here's why..."
Before I gave birth to Carrick, my son, before he was even thought of, I attended a three-day continuing education class for certification in pregnancy massage. It included four students and a teacher. One of the most powerful statements to ever come across my ears was spoken by the wise woman instructing us for the weekend.
Dear Olga said to us, "Every birth is perfect, no matter how the child comes into the world. C-section, home birth, with or without drugs, none of that matters. Every birth is perfect simply because the birth welcomes a human child into this world. What is more precious and sacred than that? The important thing is that the child comes, the rest is immaterial. Every birth is perfect because every birth brings life."
This statement challenged everything I knew about birth. I had 20 some-odd years of debris and rubble piled on top of what I thought birth should be and with one breath, she blew it all away. In my mind, I had thought, "Only bad moms have premature babies. C-sections are evil. The only way to have a baby is without drugs..." and so on. One by one, these notions fell to the power and truth of Olga's words.
And so it is with great joy, excitement, and a little nervousness that I introduce you to my year-long journey to have my very own Perfect Birth.
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